I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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