every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
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The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
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Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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