Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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