Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize