We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
