LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
