Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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