Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
