You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
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Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
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When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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