Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
should my penis look like a turkey
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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