So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
