Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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