drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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