6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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