i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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