i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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