1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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