the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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