i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
