Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
