She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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