We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize