all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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