I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
