oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
