I'm going to jail i love you
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
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It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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