this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
