she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize