Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Randomize