dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
