you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize