I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
