everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
