your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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