I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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