i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize