Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
