I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
It's never too late to be topless.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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