so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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