Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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