I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize