I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
