Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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