That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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