I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize