The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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