The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"