I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Randomize
