Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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