i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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