I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize