May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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