so explain again why im purple
no
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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